Successfully Surviving a Brain Injury

Reflections for Survivors and Caregivers

Reflections for Caregivers

Have I found a suitable balance between caring for my survivor and living my life?

Caregivers frequently tell us, “If my survivor is happy, I’m happy.” However, too many caregivers have little or no help from others. They must be reminded that there are limits to any one person's emotional and physical health. An ailing caregiver is a poor caregiver.

Learning about My Survivor’s Brain Injury and Being Honest with Myself

  1. What else can I learn about my survivor's brain injury?
  2. Would I benefit from attending or, if necessary, forming a support group—preferably one for caregivers only, so I can speak openly and not feel so isolated?
  3. Would I benefit from reading about how other caregivers and survivors face their challenges?
  4. What have I learned from our successes and our disappointments?
  5. Can I acknowledge that some of my survivor's impairments will be permanent?
  6. Are there ways to compensate for my survivor’s lost abilities, so that we can improve our lives?

Supporting My Survivor As Best I Can

  1. Have I considered all appropriate medical care for my survivor?
  2. Do I praise my survivor for any new achievement—however small?
  3. Do I lose patience too often with my survivor?
  4. Am I creative in finding ways to help my survivor?
  5. Do my survivor and I have an understanding on when he really needs my help?
  6. Have I learned when to safeguard my survivor and when to allow him more independence?
  7. What more can I do to help my survivor live a fuller and more independent life?

Supporting Our Family As Best I Can

  1. Is there more that our family and friends should know about our survivor's brain injury?
  2. What can I do to help my family adapt better to the special needs of our survivor?
  3. Can I involve my children more—in an age-appropriate manner—in the recovery of our survivor?
  4. What must I do to protect my children and myself from any physical and emotional harm by our survivor?

Maintaining a Positive Attitude

  1. Do I try to be grateful for what we have, rather than dwelling on our misfortune?
  2. Am I able to celebrate any progress—however small—in my survivor's condition?
  3. Do I remind myself often that recovery can be a slow process?
  4. Do I believe that my survivor can progress indefinitely?
  5. Can I let go of any blame I assign to my survivor, myself, or someone else who contributed to my survivor's injury?
  6. Would I benefit from seeing a professional counselor, preferably one who knows brain injury?
  7. Can I lean on my faith for strength and comfort?

Living My Life

  1. Do I bear too great a portion of the caregiving responsibilities?
  2. Could I ask others for help more often?
  3. Do I pursue interests of my own?
  4. Do I spend time with friends?
  5. Do I enjoy periodic vacations from my caregiving responsibilities?

Planning for the Future

  1. Have I explored all avenues to financial security?
  2. Are we prepared for the day I am no longer able to care for my survivor?

Celebrating

  1. Am I proud that my survivor and I are making the best of a difficult situation?

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Reflections for Survivors

Copyright 2006 Jessica Whitmore / Garry Prowe. All rights reserved.